Family is Determined by Who Stays
Hello and welcome to All Things Foster, a place for coffee, connection, and community. Guys, we have got a great guest that I'm excited for you guys to hear the story. before we get to that though, first of all, thank you for listening and tuning in. today's sponsor is brought to you by our friends at Classic Cleaning. Shauna and the team at Classic Cleaning have been incredible friends to POCN.
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And when you do, make sure to tell them that you heard about them on All Things Foster. Classic Cleaning. You can't beat a classic. Well, Carissa, thank you so much for coming on the podcast today. I'm excited to to talk to you. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Yeah, absolutely. You know, we we talked a little bit before we got started, and you you have just a just a turbulent but you know amazing story. And so before we kind of get into the
Nitty gritty of of your foster care type story. Give us a little background on kind of who you are. Yes. Okay. So I am Chrissa. I am from Amarillo. Moved here when I was in sixth grade. graduated high school here from Highland Park. Went to WT, graduated from WT. I have one daughter, she's JC, she's s sorry, she's 31 now, married, has two boys, Barry and Benny. Barry is five. Benny will be two in November.
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They live in Germany. her husband plays professional hockey over there. single mom had JC when I was seventeen. JC, you know, taught me to be a mom. She I grew up with her. I
You know, we were babies, a baby gro raising a baby, you know. And so there's I don't know if you know who Rach Rachel Platt is, but she has that song Growing Up Raising You Yes, yes. And so, you know, it was JC and I. You know, of course my mom was always there. She was our backbone growing up. You know, you anywhere you saw me, that was my mom and JC behind. If you saw my mom, JC and I were somewhere right behind. Yeah. you know, growing up, JC got into sports, soccer.
volleyball, basketball, and I coached her through all. volleyball and soccer, I coached her until they started learning had to learn plays. Yeah. I was out then and then coached her in basketball all the way from sixth grade to senior year. Wow. and then, you know, JC growing up had all the friends. All the kids were always at the house, in and out all day, every day. had a home day care at the time. So kids were always around. Yeah. Then
JC leaves the nest. At seventeen, she or eighteen, I'm sorry, excuse me, at eighteen she flew flew the coop and which I had always wanted her to expand her wings and and go somewhere else besides Amarillo. Sure. So she did a year at WT and then went to Denton and did Denton. Then that's when we got the first call.
For to take in a little boy, two and a half month old baby. So what happens there? What talk to us about? So I had started taking some foster parenting classes through Arrow Ministry. And I had made a Facebook post one day about here's my journey to foster parenting classes. My house is quiet. I'm lonely. It's my it's just way too quiet. So took a
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foster parenting class and made the post and I had an acquaintance reach out to me via Facebook and said, I wish I would have known. We're looking for somebody to take my nephew. And so I said, Well, I'd be happy to talk to you guys. And they showed up, we talked, the goal was to have him, we were gonna visit with him for the next month or two.
Just to kind of get to know him before mom was to report back to court to be sentenced. that I wanna say was on a Monday.
Maybe it was a Tuesday. It was a Tuesday. Wednesday afternoon we got a call that said we need you to take the baby now. Mm. Mom was rearrested and went to jail immediately. And so here he came. Mm-hmm again. No bed, no clothes, no wasn't ready for a little boy. Well, yeah, 'cause you I mean you said you started classes. And so I had a bunch of girl stuff just because I had five nieces plus my daughter. And so we had
a an abundance of girl clothes. Yeah. Girl blankets, bottles, sippy cups. the whole nine yards. We had everything girl. And so then Jackson came along at, you know, he was two and a half months old when I got him. And here we started with the boy stuff. And so got him, you know, between he's twelve now.
Lots of court appearances, fighting for custody, visitation, who was gonna be primary, who was gonna be you know, all the things. Yeah. timelines we had to keep from the moment we met with them until the day he was adopted. Yeah. face or not really a whole lot of Facebook pictures, more Instagram pictures. I wasn't really into the Facebook when we first got Jackson. you know.
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Going back and printing all those off. All of our pictures now are on our phone. And so or social media. We don't print pictures anymore. So, you know, we had to have all the documentation, make sure that we had, you know, all of our ducks in a row. And finally, I got a message from BioMom and she said that she was ready for me to adopt Jackson. And so we
Immediately I started all the paperwork. That same night. The night that I got that text message from her, I started the paperwork. Right. And we did all the things and then in January of twenty two we officially adopted Jackson.
So was he placed w did you finish the licensing process before you got him or no? No, I did not. So once I got him, it was a little overwhelming for me. One just because I didn't have anything and and you know, and he I was working full time and now we had this baby and so I I just kinda put all the foster parenting paperwork and classes on hold. Yeah.
I'm still in contact with them, you know, or I stayed in contact with them. And she kind of guided me, Amy Anderson. She guided me through a lot of the, you know, the obstacles that I had to go through. And the reason I chose Arrow, Amy's daughter and my oldest daughter went to school together. And so Amy, I've known Amy for years, and she's she's amazing. And so put all those on hold.
He was never placed through CPS. It was kind of just like a private thing that we did. Okay. I didn't wanna have to deal with all the the hoops and paperwork that CPS had, so we just kinda left it a private thing. I see. Okay. And it worked. and then, you know, it it got a little tricky when we had to start filing the the paperwork, but you know, all the motions and and everything. But
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We stuck with it. I had an amazing attorney that that helped me and guided me through everything. Tim Pirtle who is now the district judge. but again, he he was there to fight for me and we did. It was a battle. And but we stuck with it and he's mine and he he knows no different, you know. You tell a lot of kids, you know, they're gonna be adopted or whatever. And when I had to sit down and tell Jackson, hey buddy.
We're gonna adopt you. You know what that means? And he was like, No. And I said, Well, you know, you have a birth mom that you know, and then you have a heart mommy. You have a tummy mommy and a heart mommy. I like that. And I said, So I'm gonna adopt you and now I'm gonna be your forever mom. And he was like, Well, you're already my mom. Yeah. And so he didn't know. He was in second grade. I didn't wanna tell him then, but because of all the court hearings Second grade. So this has been like
Yeah, he's going to seven years. Well so yeah. So I had him at two or I got him when he was two and a half months old. And then in second grade, I the judge told me that it would be best to tell him now that he was not biologically mine Right. I wasn't ready for that. That was I that was a hard pill to swallow. It it was I knew he wouldn't understand. He's a super, super smart kid. I mean, brilliant. And
But I knew he wasn't gonna understand, you know, the because I'm all he's ever known. Sure. Yeah. And so, you know, having to explain to him that, you know, well, the tummy mommy, and then she didn't make very good choices, and then you came to live with me, and so now here we are. And so, again, he was clueless. He knew he was gonna go to court and talk to a judge. we all had shirts, a bunch of his friends showed up.
It was an amazing day. we had a big party afterwards and but yeah, so he was adopted when he was seven. Mm-hmm. And he just turned well, he turned twelve the end of May. Cool. And we'll be going into seventh grade this year. Wow. And so So take us back to that first night. I mean, you get this just call out of nowhere. you make this post, I'm looking into this, and then all of a sudden I've got this
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Little boy. I mean, what was going through your mind at this point? It was actually, you know, kind of I don't know, I guess kinda like shell shock. So when when they left my house, they said they were gonna think about it and then let me know. And they literally got to the end of the block and said, We want you to take him. Wow. And I remember telling my mom, you know, if they didn't call back, I wouldn't be disappointed. you know.
Babies, when they're infants, you know, they sleep, eat, poop. That's it. Yeah. But Jackson was different. He just kinda laid there. He was never woke up, you know, just was very and so I was like, I don't know if this is what I want to do. Do I want babies or do I want older, you know, toddlers? maybe even babies about nine months, you know, I wasn't sure. And it's sad to say now, you know, when you do foster care.
It's like going to the market. You get to pick and choose what you want. You know, do you want a brand new baby? Do you want toddlers? Do you want school age kids? Kindergarten, you know, elementary age, or do you want older kids? Do you want boys? Do you want girls? Do you want white children? African American? Do you want, you know, and so that's a sad thing for me to to think that people get to go to a market and and pick and choose what kids. And so my only
request that when I started the foster parenting classes was that in the very beginning, could I just have girls because I had an abundance of girls stuff. Sure. Let me build up my boy supply. Right. And so but you know, once we got Jackson, you know, it
It wasn't long before he had way more than he needed. Was did your community help at all at this point? I mean with him. Excuse me. With Jackson, I didn't have a whole lot of community help. we just kinda my mom and I just kinda bought things here and there. Yeah. and there may have been a few friends or something that brought, you know, a few things over, but it was nothing significant. We didn't have any care packages through any organizations. We didn't have
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You know, anything like that. At that time I didn't even know there were organizations that that helped with care packages or car seats or, you know, a clothes closet, anything like that. So so no, we didn't have we just kind of bought things as we needed them. Right. So yeah, it was the first night it it was I will say it was the whole time until he was eighteen months was tough. He was he cried.
All day, all night, unless he was asleep. And he would sleep about sixteen hours a day. my gosh. he was after looking what I know now, if I knew then, I do think he was
Coming down off meth Yeah. And he was not born addicted to to drugs, but afterwards mom had the exposure. Yeah. And so again, had I known then what I know now, I I think I could have, you know, had him tested or, you know, done done things a little differently, other than why is he crying all the time? You know, but
thankfully, you know, my mom was there and we just did a lot of holding and snuggling. Yeah, I had to go back to work. My mom was not working at the time she was at home, so she kept him and it was just a lot of, you know, holding him. And then finally at eighteen month about fifteen months, he finally Settled in Settled in and I can't remember exactly how long we had him from two and a half months until
eight fifteen, eighteen months. But there was a time in there where Bio Mom had been released from prison and had visitation with him. Supervised visitation. Yeah. And then we did that for a little bit and then she went back to prison and was gone for two years, I think maybe, and then came back. And again we still had the visitations and it it it got better. She and I
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Got on the same page. We were able to communicate with one another. You know, she I invited her to the house for Christmas, for Thanksgiving, for his birthdays. We stayed in contact with one another, you know, and so things were better with her and I. She finally realized I wasn't out to get her. Right. Yeah. I was here just to protect the child. Yeah. And I didn't want him going into a situation that was not going to be healthy for him, whether it be with her or through a different placement or, you know,
Whatever. I just he was with me. He was family. And as long as she could stay on the straight and narrow, she would always be welcome anytime with us and could have him whenever she wanted him. And so we've done that. And you know, he's older now and he's into gaming, and so he's not as fun or wanting to go as many places as he did, you know, when he was younger. So it is hard for, you know, her to come and get him because he either
is on his phone or he doesn't there's not a whole lot of things for kids to do here in Amarillo. So it's like, you know, she'll talk to him, you know, occasionally and he knows who she is, he knows who I am and you know, he's he understands it all now. So so yeah, it it it was an interesting Yeah, that's this went on for Seven years. Yeah. Seven years with him, yeah. And so I wouldn't change anything, you know, it was other than
knowing the exposure, the drug exposure I think he was, you know, exposed to and being exposed to while we had visitation. Mm-hmm. Because his Yeah, because they can get that contact high. just just skin to skin. Yeah. If they come and and they've been high recently, it's on their clothes, it's on their skin. And then they c so then they, you know, they're working up they're working on the withdrawals and then they go to visit and then they get that contact high again.
And now they gotta go through the withdrawal process again and again and again. Yeah. And so it was it was, you know, that that was the hardest part with him. Sure. And so it's but again at about fifteen months I think we no longer had the contact anymore. And we got him and then it was he was older and I think sh when she got out the last time she stayed on the straight and narrow and
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She didn't we didn't have any more issues with that. So that's good. So yeah. So from two and a half months old to now he's twelve and we've changed his name and he yeah. So and then Well you had some experience before him. Do you want to talk about that? Yeah. So the the prior experience that I've had through, you know, kinship placement. I've had placements with three of my nieces. they were my brother's children.
And they are they are my brother's children. they I had placement with his oldest daughter.
Two or three times through CPS. and then his the two younger children, I had placement twice, I believe, with them. And the last time with my brother's kiddos was it was not a a it was very traumatic for everybody involved. No doubt. And and so, you know, he had my
niece, my middle niece, and then he had a set of twins and one of the twins was accidentally killed with a a a gunshot point blank. And so you know it was how old at the She was I wanna say twenty two months old. my gosh. And so I'm horrible with dates. I'm horrible with ages. and so they, you know, it was it was traumatic all the way around for everybody involved. Yeah. And I was
angry and sad and overwhelmed all at the same time. And, you know, I I didn't know how to I've never been through that before. I've never had to experience all of that at one time. And so I did have trouble channeling my anger or my frustrations or trying to be happy for the girls and, you know, not cry and still do fun things with them while we're still trying to
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cope with the loss of my niece. And so you know, so that was my previous experience with them. It was never all three times with all three of the the the girls, my nieces, it was never
It was not enjoyable memories of why they were in care. No doubt. obviously the memories we have while they were with us were very enjoyable, but why we received them, it was, you know, just it was horrible. Yeah. And so that was the, you know, the previous times through kinship. And then, you know, I didn't know that I would up until I started the foster parenting classes, you know, I never had thought I would
have any other placements just because one, I was just going to focus on my daughter and get her through college and kind of go through there. And I can honestly say I never thought that I would have a a feeling of, my gosh, my house is so quiet. Or what do I do now? You know, I I didn't have we weren't running to town to town for a a basketball tournament or, you know, because that's what we did every weekend, you know, she played basketball. We were
at a basketball tournament. We were in the gym all the time. Mm-hmm. And you know, I can remember when I had custody of the last two nieces, the oldest one, you know, she was on my hip every game. Mm-hmm. And if she happened to if it was an intense game and I set her down and she happened to walk off, everybody in the gym knew who she was because she grew up in the gym, you know. She was a gym rat. And, you know, she was there with us and you know, it's I've got pictures of her on my hip, you know, just
you know, coaching and, you know, the game's intense and we're going and there were times that I would have to say, okay, you've got to go. But she never wanted to be anywhere else but on on the bench with us. And so, you know, but I never thought I would have that emptiness feeling that I had. And so, again, JC, she we grew up together. She was my best friend, you know, she taught me how to be a mom. And, you know, I I can say that when I had her at 17, I did. I had a
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a natural mother instinct that just kicked in. And I knew, you know, of course I'd babysat from the time I probably was ten, you know, all the way up. And so I'd always been around kids. Sure. And so it just, you know, babies came to me as just a natural thing. You know, I just I took in. You know, there's and so, but the empty nest hit and I could remember taking her to Denton and
I cried the whole way there and boo hooed even more the whole way home and I thought god I I was depressed. It it was awful. Yeah. And but I had always told her I wanted you to leave the coop, fly fly away, do something, you know. There's not much to do here in Amarillo. And so get out of Amarillo, spread your wings, see the world. And I will tell you she has seen the world. She's
You know, went to college in Pittsburgh. She went to Robert Morris. graduated from there. again, she met her boy f her husband now. She met him when he was here playing for the Amarillo Bulls hockey. She met him the summer going into her senior year. and then he got a full ride scholarship to Robert Morris to play hockey. She actually she came to me in January.
And said, Mom, I was accepted to Slippery Rock University in Slippery Rock, Pennsylvania. And I need to be there by January, whatever date it was. Wow. And I said, Okay. Because I told her, if you want to go off to college, you gotta you gotta find it. Yeah, sure. And she did. Wow. We loaded up, we drove through a white out blizzard in Chicago and finally got to Pittsburg or Pittsburgh or Slippery Rock. And I'll say those states up there, I thought, man.
We're gonna be snowed in for a long time. Man, you couldn't even tell that it had snowed. Right. And they I mean the snow was gone and it wasn't just pushed over into a parking lot. I don't know what they did with that snow, but it was gone. Yeah, they're used to big dumps and getting where people can move. Dropped her off, and that was an easy drop off for me. That was easier than taking her to Denton. Why? I'm not real sure, but it was easy. And then, you know, she
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Went ahead and transferred over to Robert Morris and her and her now husband graduated together. And from there they went to Canada. He played hockey there and I've lost the name of the town they were in. Anyways, and then from there they went to Sweden. Wow. They were in Sweden for five years and that's where she had my oldest grandson, Barry.
And he was fluent in in Swedish. He could talk Swedish. For sure. and now they're in Germany. And so now they're Benny will be fluent, I think, in German before Barry will be fluent in J German, but she had my she had both of the boys in Sweden, but now they're they're in Germany. They both go to German schools. the youngest one goes to an all German school and Barry is at a bilingual German English school. And so
That's crazy. So anyway, so yeah. So then you got another one. Yep. And so, yeah, it's I'm all over the place. There are people who save animals. Well, I want to save all the children. Yeah. It's a good thing I don't have a really, really big house. but I went to school with a guy and he had three kids, but I took in Natalie.
And she kinda just stayed with me. She helped a lot with Jackson. You know, she was amazing. She she was there for all his first, his first steps, his first words, everything. And so I was working and, you know, so she would help me babysit with him and her little brother. And she was she didn't I wanna say she moved in when she was in fifth or sixth grade. I can't remember exactly. Through C P S or No, she just kinda came and and
helped me one weekend and then never went back home. Wow. And so mom and dad both knew, you know, she was there. And they, you know, it was it was okay that she was there. And so we, you know, went through the years and she's been with me. And there were some rough patches with with her and I, you know, she became a teenager and she wanted her she wanted her roles. And you know, and there was a time that
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She did. She had to leave my house because, you know, just things weren't going we weren't seeing eye to eye. Yeah. Mm and so not that I didn't love her anymore, any less, but she had to she had to go leave. Yeah. And so she actually spent about a year at the children's home here in Amarillo. Okay. And then she went out on her own. Mm mm and you know, we stayed in contact and she had moved into her own apartment and
I didn't like where she was living. And so I moved her back in with me because then I got my next placement. Right. And so this placement was through CPS. Okay. So at this point you had gotten foster license? so no, actually I it was a kinship. I never like before this last one, never had like registered my home to be a foster home of any kind 'cause I never finished the classes. Sure. And I
After Jackson, I honestly can say that I was not having any more children come to my home. You know, Natalie was there. She was older and so, but I wasn't gonna take any more babies. I yeah was gonna, you know, raise Jackson, get him, and then I was ready to be done with kids. And so I knew eventually JC would start having kids of her own and I wanted to be there for you know for them. And so anyways, I
My house was done. I got rid of all the baby stuff. And it was hard to keep any little boy stuff at the house because my grandkids live overseas. And so, you know, they're here once or twice a year and you know, by the time they're back, they've already outgrown whatever it is. So we got rid of everything. And
You know, the years happened. Jackson, see heen, he was seven, about to no, he had just turned eight when I got a call on I well, I received a text message from my sister that said, You want a baby? And I'm thinking, well, her my niece had just had a baby a couple of weeks before. And I'm thinking, you know, maybe they just need a break, he's crying, you know.
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Let's take him to Chrissa And she said, It's not your nephew. It's it's a baby girl. Mm-hmm. So I was like, What? Yeah. So I called her. I said, The heck with texting. I'm just gonna call her and see what she's talking about. And so I'm like, What are you talking about? And I was like, Are you serious? And she's like, Yeah, I have a friend who he got this girl pregnant and she's tested positive for meth. The baby tested positive for meth, but
CPS said if we can if he can find somebody to take the baby, they will let her go with them. Right. And I said, well, I don't know if I have a red flag on my file through CPS. but I mean, we can try it, you know, we'll see. I said, but I'd kind of like to meet this guy tonight, you know, just to kind of see what we're walking into. And I called him and I think we met up.
at like nine o'clock at night and I went to his house and you know, I kinda was trying to figure out, you know, okay, what is your name? You know, what is your story? If we're getting you know, and so excuse me, so I met him and so I said, Well, I'll message the investigator first thing in the morning and see, but I can't make any promises, you know, 'cause again
I don't know if my bad experience CPS experien my CPS file will have a big red flag on it. So he says, Okay, well, you know, we'll try. So I messaged the investigator right at eight o'clock that morning and I messaged him my name, my address, date of birth, where I worked, social, said that I was, you know, that the bio dad's information, bio mom's information, and that
I would be more than happy to take the baby. Well, that's like sitting on pins and needles, you know, watching the clock tick. You know, it's come on, come on, call, go. You know, why has he not called me yet? D did I have the red flag on my file? You know, what's going on? And so finally at ten o'clock, I was working in a law firm at the time and I talked to one of the attorneys and I said, I'm just gonna call. Yeah. She's like, We'll do it. So
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I called him and he answered and I said, Hey, I know you're probably super busy. but you know, I just wanted to one to make sure that you got my text and two to see if there's anything else you need. And he sa he said, Actually, I've already found you in our system. I'm working on all of your stuff now. I he had I he asked for some more information. I can't remember exactly what it was. I gave him that information and he said, Okay, I'm gonna run you, I'll run your background, and then if everything pans out, I'll give you a call here in a little while.
Now keep in mind, I have not told anybody what's going on. Nothing. I mean, other than my mom knew that I was gonna go meet this guy about a baby. Sure. I didn't tell her that I'd heard from the case where or the investigator. I hadn't told Jackson, Natalie, JC, my boyfriend. I hadn't told anybody what's going on, just simply because if it didn't work out, I didn't want everybody to be like, well.
Where's this baby? Yeah. And so I just kind of kept it hush, hush. So it was probably between two and three. Fine, and I don't think I got any work done that day at work. You know, just pacing, pacing. Come on, come on, come on. And so finally he called me and said, I need your mom's social. So I was like, okay, let me call her and get it and I'll call you right back. So I called my mom and I said, Hey, I need your social. She's like, For what? And I said, Well,
They're gonna place the baby with us. Yeah. She's like, Are you serious? And I said, Yeah. So you can imagine the thought running through her mind because I was living with her. We were living together. Yeah. And we have Natalie, we have Jackson, and now we're gonna have another baby at this house. And so I'm like, it's gonna be fine. And she's like, Chris we don't have anything. And I said, I we'll figure it out. We figured it out with Jackson, we'll figure it out with this one. And so
I called him back and gave him her information and I don't know, thirty, forty five minutes later he said he had messaged me and said originally we were gonna meet at the hospital first, get the baby, and then he was gonna go to my house and check my house out, and then we would have to go to CPS. Yeah. So I was like, Okay, so we were prepared to go to the hospital first. You know, our house is lived in, you know. I think that morning I'd taken a load out of the dryer and threw it on the couch, put the load in the washer in the dryer, you know.
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I'm sure there were breakfast dishes of some sort in the sink, you know. But you know, everybody thinks CPS, my God, my house has to be spotless. Yeah, and that's you know and so I I know your people. Yeah, like and so but everybody is terrified, you know. my god, if your house isn't clean, they're you know, they're not gonna place any kids with you. Yeah. And so I tell my mom, I'm like, Hey, can you leave work? you know, and she's like, my god, what is the hot water heater supposed to be set at? You know, because our hot water heater, you turn it on, it's gonna take your skin off. It was so hot, you know.
Yeah. And so I'm like, I don't know. I don't I d I have no idea. Just go and throw the clothes back in the dryer and put the dishes in the sink. I mean in the dishwasher. And so throw the covers on the bed. And we're not a family that makes our bed every morning, you know. Let's just get in it. I try real hard, but it just, you know, some mornings is good, some mornings, you know what is what it is. And so he he's met us at the house and he literally checked all the bedrooms.
Made sure the pantry the refrigerator had food in it. Made sure there was running water. He didn't even check for hot water, just running water. Yeah. And he said, Do you have somewhere for her to sleep? Well, I just happened to still have a little pink pack'n play from my niece's. Wow. And I said, Yeah, this is what she'll have for right now. And he said, Perfect. Wow. And off to the hospital I went. My mom didn't go, Jackson didn't go, and
By this point, now I had called my boyfriend and told him, Hey, we're getting a baby. He's like, What? He was like, How old is this baby? And I'm like, like three days old? I said she was born on the 11th and it's now the 14th. And he was like, This is a joke, right? And I said, No, it's not a joke. Yeah. I said, I'm headed to the hospital now. And so my best friend had lived next door to my mom.
And so I called her and told her and she was like, What? Yeah. And so go to the hospital and I remember walking into the nursery and there were a couple of nurses standing there and I looked at them and I said, Guys, I need you to be a hundred percent honest with me. Cause I knew that she had been born and tested positive for drugs. And I knew I talked to to BioMom the night before or the morning of.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (36:23.482)
The day I got her on the 14th of July and said, I need to know like how long have you been doing drugs? Yeah. Before you delivered. And she said, I till the day I delivered. So I'm thinking in my mind, what is this baby gonna be like? Okay. Am I even honestly gonna be able to handle this baby? Sure. and the nurses said, you know.
She's been amazing. You know, that first day she had a couple of really high, shrill cries and kind of cried, had a little trouble feeding. She said, but by day two, she had really rid really settled in and we've not had much, not noticed many withdrawal symptoms, you know. And so I was like, okay. I was like, so she just doesn't cry all day long. And they were like, no. And I'm like, okay, so here this little bitty bitty tea tiny baby, you know.
And it had been years since I had a brand new baby, fresh baby, you know. And I Jackson was two and a half months old, you know, when I got him. And so here she is, this tea tiny little baby, you know. And I knew going to the hospital I was bringing a baby home. And I know leaving the hospital, you have to have a car seat. Okay. And I had a car seat, it was in the car. and so
We go in and we sign some paperwork and the nurses, they were so so helpful. They packed us extra formula bottles and diapers and passies. They gave us extra passies and, you know, everything. And you know, said, if you need anything else, you let us know. We'll bring it. Or you can come by and get it. And so from we walked out of the nursery and I'm just holding her in my arms. And the nurse walks down with us.
And I look at the nurse and I said, I don't even have the car seat. It's in the car. And I'm parked over there. I said, Do I need to go? You know, what do I gotta do? And so, you know, I'm high alert, you know, but I'm so scatterbrained that I didn't even think to take a car seat into the hospital. So we and got the car seat. We put her in, you know, and off to CPS we go. And the paperwork, I felt like we were there forever. And so,
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (38:42.358)
Then she starts getting fussy and I'm very like, my gosh, you know, and I'm trying to hurry the paperwork along and we're doing this. Yeah, and you know, he's like, gosh, I gotta go make a copy of this. And I'm like, my gosh, you know, and so finally we finish and out the door I went. Yeah. And we get home and in I walk with this itty bitty tea tiny little baby, and my son was sitting there and he
had tears in his eyes and he it was the little sister he needed. And you know, and finally, you know, called JC and had to call, you know, we've seven hour time difference. You know, and so we call her and are the next day, but you know, we're all there and everybody meets her and you know, she's there and we still have nothing. Yeah. And so, you know, that's that was that's Jordan.
Yeah.
Going into getting Jordan, Dad had told me that he had been out of prison, but he was clean and sober and that he was gonna, you know, take the drug test and do what he needed to do and he was gonna get her back. And so, you know, I was thinking, all right, fine, you know, that's great. And so about two or three weeks into it, I knew she probably wasn't going anywhere. Yeah. and so we, you know, did all the
home visits and home studies and kinship, workers coming to the house, case workers coming to the house. Gotta leave work early and take off for this or take off for that. You know, doctor's appointment after doctor's appointment. And so
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (40:29.674)
We had Jordan and that's kind of how all that was. And then finally, I again wasn't a hundred percent sure on, you know, I had no idea about your organization, Panhandle Orphan Network, had no idea about Amarillo Angels. and didn't really get a lot of information from that from CPS. I I'll be honest, I'm not real sure how I got connected with Amarillo Angels.
It may have been somebody from Arrow that told me about that or I I honestly don't remember. but I'm not one to ask for, you know, I'm not gonna post anything on Facebook that I need this or call and ask somebody. And so, but thankfully, you know, my sister she put a post on her Facebook and then another good friend of mine made a post on her Facebook and the
Drop offs at my house were unbelievable. I mean, the big janitor sized trash bags full of clothes being dropped off, bassinets, baby beds, clothes from summer newborn to winter newborn to I don't think the kid ever wore an outfit twice. I mean, you know, and I didn't have to buy any clothes probably until she was over a year old. Right. Obviously we did, you know, but I would have never had to buy her any clothes. She had so many clothes. Right. Blankets and
everything and so but you got a placement package for this one. We did, yes. And so I remember getting a call. I want to say I spoke with you. and you guys put together a placement package. They called asked what we needed. I think I remember asking for a bathtub, a baby bathtub, a diaper bag and I said and honestly I don't know what else I need, you know, and so you guys were very you know gracious and bringing
a care package, they brought it and I remember getting, you know, you were always texting me, reminding me of an event y'all were doing, or you had extra tickets to a pumpkin patch or we were going to air you or somewhere, Cinergy you know, and so you guys always had that. Arrow, you know, they were they gave us some care packages. We were invited to their Christmas party at Cinergy And when I tell you
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (42:52.039)
the people that gave gifts for not only Jordan but for Jackson as well was overwhelming. I mean it was I never thought that would have they would receive the amount of gifts they got for, you know, for Christmas that year. And again, did they need them? No, because they had what they had at home. But and that's what I had told Arrow and I think when I
talk to somebody from your organization. I'm like, you know, honestly, I don't, you know, I don't know that we need it. And I think you both told me, well, why not? What's it gonna hurt? Yeah, we've got this done. No, it's here, why not? And so I was like, well, you know, but if there's somebody else that needs it more, then by all means take it to them. And they said, why are you any different? And so, you know, I kind of had to learn how to take, you know, you know, to accept that, you know, because
I've always just been the one to I will figure it out. Right. We'll get it done. You know, regardless of what. I was like that with, you know, JC. I've always been the one to work two or three jobs because we'll get it. If you want it, I'll get it for you. If we need it, I've got it. Yeah. And so that was that was a hard pill for me to swallow to try to figure out how to take not a handout, but accepting the help that somebody was willing to give us. And so Well and you have all of these other experiences where you
didn't have any yeah support. And so now you've got this experience where it's just like everybody's bringing you stuff. I mean, t tell talk to this about the difference in the way that felt, you know, where you've every time you've gotten these kids many times and and there's really no support. And then this time, like you there's just people helping. Yeah. So it was very overwhelming. you know, again.
all the other times, placements, even with Jackson, you know, there was nothing. so with Jordan, it was, you know, we had Arrow, we had you guys, we had the community, I had family, friends, you know, and it was I can remember sitting in the living room with what looked like a laundromat had exploded of baby girl clothes.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (45:09.581)
You know, and I'm very O C D and anal about all this stuff. And so I'm trying to put this the newborn clothes in one pile and then the zero to three in one pile and then the three months and then three to six and all six, six to you know, and I want it all separated that way. And then I got it all separated. Well, washed it, then got it all separated, and then I'm like, okay, I know I can get rid of all the newborn and zero to three.
Probably three to six months winter clothes. I can get rid of all those. I can put them in a in a different bag and give them to somebody else because I don't need them. And so, and then just sitting there thinking, golly, I have a hundred onesies shirts, but I only have 10 pants. And so I'm like, I need a complete outfit. Yeah. You know? And so it was just the overwhelming, but very thankful, you know, that that we had all of this stuff, you know, but it was like.
Wow, where does where where did these people come from? Where were where was the rest that I needed all these other times? Yeah. And so it was, you know, it was. It was very overwhelming. And, you know, we got through it. It was there, you know, and Jordan finally, you know, we outgrew the house, you know. And so I was sharing a room with her. I had her crib set up in my room and my mom had a storage building behind her house and
It had garage door on it and a door. And I remember I said, you know, I'm gonna turn that into my room. I said, and Jordan can have the house. I said, I'm tired of sharing a room with a baby. And so I moved out there and that's about the time Natalie came to live with us. And so I switched rooms around and moved Jackson to this room. And I moved all of my stuff after getting the
the storage building set up and tiled and an air conditioner put out there and my bed and Natalie took over our room. So again, I was still living with a baby in my room. but it was a bigger room. So it you know it was it was a little better. And but you know, there was no bathroom out there. So anytime, you know middle of the night, the winter, you know, it's rainy, it's freezing, snowing, you gotta walk into the house and then you're wide awake, you know, at two o'clock in the morning.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (47:32.051)
And so and Jordan, you know, she didn't sleep. She never slept. She still hasn't slept all night. Never. And so, and I was working, you know, at the time. And so I would get a couple of hours of sleep. And luckily, I will say I was able to take her to work with me for the first little bit. That's good. you know, trying to get her into a daycare, there's a waiting list at every daycare. You know, there's around CCMS like
Yeah. It's tarp. And so I did get, you know, CCMS but that was a process too. You know. I, you know, paperwork I you know, and I had to provide check stubs. And I'm like, why do I have to provide any check stubs? You know, it's this is a placement through CPS. And so you know, finally got her in, you know, and you know, there's daycares you don't want to go to and you know, you've got to avoid that. And
How long it how long it had been since I'd had kids in daycare, you know? And so you hear all the bad. And so, you know, she went to one and Jordan she didn't when we got her, you know, I really couldn't tell that any effects that she was having from the meth. I I I couldn't tell. But the only thing I I was very concerned about was her hearing. She responded to no sound. keys rattling. I remember holding her on my chest at
The homecoming parade for Randall. Mm-hmm. And at the beginning of the parade, you know, the fire truck goes by or the cop sirens buzzing and she was on my chest and my friend looked and she never moved. Wow. And my friend, she was a nurse practitioner and she was like or a nurse, I'm sorry. And I said, See, she doesn't respond to sound. Yeah. And so that's when I made the call to just
start we were gonna all start taking sign language classes. Any and everybody that wanted to be a part of Jordan's life needed to take the sign clip sign language. So we started at Lamar and I had taken sign language classes, sign language one and two in college. And then my daughter, JC, had taken four years of sign language. So I knew some sign language. Sure. And I could communicate, obviously not quickly, but I could communicate and
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (49:49.863)
you know, understand what people, you know, the the deaf community we're we're talking about are saying. And so then we go to Lamar and they teach the the phonetic sign language, you know, all the verbs, all the adjectives, all the nouns, all of that. And so when you say, Let's go to the store, you know
In ASL, American Sign Language is completely different than what they teach in the elementary age school. Wow. And so I was so confused, you know, and I'm like, my gosh. And it's hard to learn a new language as an adult. No, absolutely. Whether it's you know, Spanish, Swedish, German, whatever, you know. It it's hard. And you know, your hands are you're like, What? And so
My son and I and my mom and my best friend and then her kids, we all signed up to take it. And so but and we're all like the kids were they were in a different class from us and so we're learning and you know, we would go home and practice and you know, and we watched a lot of Miss Rachel. And you know, Jordan, she to this day still knows some sign language. I still do a lot of sign language at home. And you know, but we had she had failed the first initial
Hearing test in the hospital, and then we had to take her back. They said she passed. I was not convinced she passed. Right. Then we went to Amarillo audit audiology here at Amarillo. Okay. And they said she passed, and I still wasn't convinced. And so I demanded a referral to Cooks in Fort Worth. So we went down there for a non sedated, I think it's called an ABR hearing test. And they have a non sedated and a sedated. And we went down there and
They said she passed. And when the doctor had said that she had passed, she happened to drop something in the room. Yeah. Cling clanged all over the floor. And Jordan never moved. Wow. And she says, I said, I told you guys she does not hear. Yeah. And she said, Well, let's see how things go. Bring her back at six months if she's no signs, no anything, and then we'll do the sedated. Right.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (52:01.643)
And I don't know, at six months old that I guess she remembered hearing that doctor say that. And at six months old her hearing woke up. Wow. And she hears completely fine now. She has selective hearing. But she she hears. She hears. And so but yeah, so and then with Jordan, you know, placed through CPS, she I filed an intervention when I had her at six months. Yeah. just to make sure that
Do you have a voice? That I had a voice for her. Yeah. And she had already been with us. There was no sense moving her anywhere else. And I just didn't want them to come in and try to place her somewhere else, even though they had already told me that we could do adoption. Right. Because they had asked me if I would adopt her if things didn't work out. Absolutely. And so filed the intervention. CPS did not understand why I filed that intervention. Sure. And I said, you know, I
just want a voice for her. I I want a voice not only for her, but for us as well. Yeah. And so still we did another six months of paperwork, visits, the whole nine yards. And then we got a hearing set for July the eleventh on her first birthday. So July eleventh, twenty twenty three, she was officially adopted. We walked out on her first birthday with her, a part of our family. And so
That's what, you know, finished my family of five now. And so, you know, but that's
She was it. She was the finale. There's, you know, I I won my age. I don't want any more little children at home. I need to enjoy them growing up and I don't want to be in a wheelchair when my youngest one is graduating high school, you know. And so but yeah, so that's you know, the the official first placement where we received a care package from any organization, the community, family or I mean friends, family.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (54:10.743)
Don't get me wrong with the other ones, you know, we had, you know, people had given us stuff here and there, but not like it poured in with with the the the last one. Sure. And so Wow, it's it it was a journey and still a journey. Yeah, yeah, wow. I mean, just I mean can you s can you think about when you're seventeen and you've brought this little girl home and think about how, you know, thirty years later you're gonna have had
all these kids and have adopted all these kids and stuff like that. No, I can honestly say that I never in a million years thought that I would have any other kids after JC. obviously just a little backstory through JC or after JC. I had five miscarriages and then lost a son in two thousand two thousand three. my God. And so you know in two thousand three
2004, I had tied my tubes. There was no, you know, I wasn't gonna go through this anymore. So from 2004, I knew that there would be no more children. And so, and then I remember saying, Well, when JC graduates college and starts a family of her own, I'm moving to wherever she goes. Not ever realizing or dreaming that she would be overseas. Yeah. ha have they seen that they have seen the world. They've been to Germany, Sweden, Italy.
Hungry, pol everywhere. They've been everywhere. And so, you know, I just knew that I always wanted to be they call me Coco and that I always wanted to be that, you know, they can run across the street to Coco's house or I can swing by and pick up. Or you know, and so yeah. So never in a million years did I think I would still have little kids at home.
That are the same age as yeah, and grandbabies at the same time. Yeah, we're the same. We're the same. And and that's that's not an easy task, I'll tell you. Because my oldest grandson is five and then Jordan is four. So they're a year apart. And man, it's rough, you know, because it's hard to be Coco and still be mom at the same time, you know. And how do you take the grandson to go do something fun without taking the daughter to go do something fun, you know, or vice versa. And so
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (56:29.915)
It is. It's it's it's stress for both JC and I, a lot of stress. And you know, I never when I took Jordan, Jackson wasn't he didn't have to compete with little kids because JC was only eighteen, nineteen when when I got Jackson. you know, so there wasn't other little kids to compete with. But there was still JC that I never thought
Not that I didn't take her feelings into consideration, but my thought at the time was, well, she's nineteen now, you know, it's and at college it should be okay. But it was hard, you know, for her, you know, she come home. Well, now what do we do? Because we have we've got a baby now, you know. JC and I couldn't go out and, you know, if we wanted to go have a margarita or, you know, something with dinner or whatever, you know, well
What we do with the baby now? And so it it it was. It was a hard adjustment that I never, you know, I always act before I think. And so, you know, I didn't really think that part through. And then, you know, the years go through. JC's way older now. Yeah. She's had her baby. They're living overseas. I have Jackson at home and
I get the call about Jordan and I think, wow, well, I'll give Jackson a sibling. You know, JC grew up with no siblings, you know. Sure. And we're a very small family, you know. It was me and JC and my mom. We have cousins, you know, but we're it's just us. Right. And so, you know, sh people are always excited about the holidays. And I'm like, well, why do y'all get so excited about the holidays? They're like, my cousin's coming or
This cousin or my grandparents are coming, or my great grandparents are coming. Well, we didn't have any of that. Right. So, you know, Christmas, it's just the three of us. Yeah. You know, and so you know, she grew up like that. And so I thought it would be neat to give Jackson a sibling, you know, that he could grow up with and and everything. And again, I didn't think about JC and and and the grandkids, you know. And I I think a lot of
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (58:45.456)
foster parents need to really think about that when, you know, getting that call or whatever, how do your older kids feel? Sure. you know, simply because
The majority of people get into foster care for the love of the kids. You know, we do have some that are not there sure, you know, for that. but it's
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (59:12.122)
It's a decision not just you can make with your heart strings right then and there. It's it's really something that should be a sit down conversation with everybody involved. And and it's even harder for us because JC is overseas. Yeah. And so but nonetheless, you know, I wanna save all the kids there are. And I thought I'll make it work. Yeah. And so
It it is. I sometimes I sit and think, you know, I I have failed JC because when she does come home, I can't be that mom just to her. Yeah. And then I've failed her again because I can't be just that Coco to the boys. Yeah. And so you know, there's been, you know, lots of has there been like my God, if I'd have done that you would have like Exactly. Yeah. You know, and you know
Parenting differences. I mean you p you hopefully parent differently in your forties than you do in your twenties, right? Hopefully you have a little more patience and a little more understanding and things like that versus, you know, when you're younger. So with JC, she was the easiest, best baby. She slept all night from day one. She never cried, you know, unless she was hungry. she
Even I can remember when she was learning to crawl, my mom used to collect these carousel horses and they were everywhere. Knick knacks here, knick knacks there. I'm not a knick knack type of person. and JC would go over and I would just say, no, you know, and she would, you know, she learned that she couldn't do that. And you know, growing up, you know, I could just raise my I have a very, I don't know, authoritative voice anyways. And so
I could just say, JC, you know, and she would stop. Or, you know, the older she got, I could just give her the look. yeah. You know, and she knew to stop. And she, you know, she listened. You know, she I never had discipline problems with her. She went to school. We never had any issues in school. And other than her talking. And I finally told her teacher, I said, You can move her desk to the hallway and she's gonna talk to somebody. It's not gonna matter. And so, you know, and all the nieces, they were like that, you know. I could tell I
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:01:36.362)
No stop, you know, and they all listened. And I was the mom, you know, we're not wearing rain boots with shorts. We're gonna match, our outfits are gonna be, we're gonna have a bow in our hair, our hair is gonna be done. you know, and then Jackson, he was always very neat. He never wanted to be dirty, he didn't like to be sticky. and so and now then we get Jordan and Jordan is just a different breed. She is and
I I can honestly say when patience was never given to me. I've never had patience. I've never I get very worked up. If there's a crying kid, I want to know why they're crying. Can we figure out what's going on? You know, give them something, you know. And so Jordan comes along and I'm like, just give it to her. I don't even care. She wanna wear rain boots with her shorts, with pink shorts and a yellow shirt. I don't even care. Just let her go. And so JC, I I know she probably just cringes all the time and thinking, my God.
She never let me do that or she never let me have this or that. And now it's just like just roll with it. She's quiet. She's leaving me alone. I get some peace and quiet for a few minutes. So here it is. And so it's definitely been I didn't get to do that when I was a kid. You know, not, you know, a mad thing, you know, but just, you know, the parenting styles definitely, even with Jackson, you know, they change, you know, from 17, you know, and then Jackson.
And then now Jordan. And so yeah, it's it's been a challenge. Yeah, for sure. Well wow. What what a story. I mean, just just the way that I mean everything's just kind of woven together and all these I mean, all these kids' lives that you've that you've impacted, you know, I mean, it's just it's just really it's really amazing. man. So if you were gonna talk to somebody that was considering
like fostering or taking a kinship placement. What do you what do you tell So my my recommendation to you would be one, you need to sit down and have a serious conversation with your spouse, your older kids, your younger kids. You need to really figure out, you know, are you going to have time to
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:03:59.497)
Do all the appointments, all the paperwork, all the home studies, all the home visits, plus, you know, do your other kids if they're in extracurricular activities. you know, you really need to talk with the older kids one on one, not, you know, with all the other siblings involved. You know, what are your thoughts? You know, here's what's gonna happen. Really lay it out to them, letting them know we're gonna have caseworkers in. There's gonna be court appearances that we have to go to, there's gonna be kinship.
caseworkers in the house, paperwork, doctor's appointments, all the things that we're gonna have to take in, you know, to consideration. You know, the the child may come to us as straight from the hospital. They may come to us when they're, you know, a year old, two years old. they may have issues, whether it be, you know, anger issues or withdrawing from drugs or abuse or
you know the whole nine yards. It's definitely not a pretty picture to paint for anybody. Yeah. But it is definitely a picture that needs to be explained in detail. Yeah. So the kids know what they're getting into. Absolutely. Not just, Hey, we're gonna do this thing. We're gonna do this thing. Yeah. and and really take into consideration your older kids' feelings, even if they're out of the house. Yeah. You know, I I didn't do that.
And again, I I there are times that I feel like, hmm, should I have done this? Yeah. But then on the other hand, I'm like, where would these kids be today? Right. And so, do I regret it? No, absolutely not. But at the same time I do feel I should have talked a little bit better. Prepared. and so that that is one thing, you know, that you have to to truly dig deep with your your kiddos. Yeah.
Is this something that you really want to do? This kid may be really messed up, you know. and so it's and your spouse, you've got everybody's gotta be on the same page. Yep. because there are tensions that that come in fights and battles and why are they doing this or why do they get to do this and I didn't get to do that, you know? And so it's just something that you can't water down the picture. You can't use water.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:06:20.561)
Colors to paint this picture for your kids and family at home. You need the vibrant colors that they're gonna see so that they know the whole picture. For sure. And then sit down after you've talked to everybody and really do some soul searching with yourself to see if this is something that is gonna keep the family and not divide a family. Yeah. Yeah. And so that's just paint a pretty
vibrant picture for everybody involved. That's fully w aware and realistic. Yes. Yes. Wow.
Well okay. I'm just gonna we've we haven't followed this at all, which is No we haven't. We've we've definitely gone off of topic. But out of your your we've it's been it's been great. So we'll we'll chop all that part out. so well so Chrissa I just really thank you for just coming on and sharing this this kind of woven
quilt of all these different kids coming and going and just being just being willing, right? And and and being willing to say yes, even though it like wasn't like you know, these couple of times where you're like, I think I might do this and then boom, you know, it happens. And I mean you don't even get two steps on the path and already you've got kiddos and and just you know, there are there are not many people, not nearly enough people who
who say yes right to these kiddos. And so, you know, I just appreciate you coming on, sharing your story and really being willing, like I said, to to to say yes when so many when so many other people haven't. Is there anything we haven't talked about that you would like to mention? Well I just you know to speak out to other parents who are either currently a foster home kinship placement
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:08:22.267)
or are thinking about it because we all know there's not nearly enough foster homes, foster parents out there to to take in all these kiddos that are in the system. you know, unfortunately the the placement homes that we have, they're constantly full, you know, there's and so I just, you know, it's something that that weighs heavy on me, you know, just just because of my situation that
that I've been through and, you know, having now to set back as having an an adult child now and having to sit back and look at that the decisions that I have made and obviously not changing anything that I've made and don't regret anything other than I should have did a little more
a lot better communication with my oldest and and and talked to her and really truly, you know, understood her feelings. But I just, you know, our family no family is perfect. And my family is not perfect. our journeys have not been perfect. it's been rocky roads. you know, but I always say there's just a pothole. It can be patched. And so it's, you know
it doesn't matter, you can paint all the pretty pictures and whatever you want to, but behind closed doors there's potholes in the house somewhere, you know. but you just have to t to be strong and and and know that as a family that, you know, you can get through this and you can raise these kids to be my goal in life, whether it had been from taking placement kids, my own children, adopting these kids, coaching all these kids.
It's just to leave a positive impact with these kids, to know that I was always there. I was always the one cheering for them, you know, being there, and just to be decent human beings, nice human beings in life. And so that's that's the only thing, you know, parents need to understand. You can't raise these kids to be how you were or how you want them to be. You just have to
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:10:36.022)
They just have to trust you and and know that you're there. there there's value and talking about all of it, you know, from how you got your first one, your biological one, to you know, your first adoption to the last adoption, you know. and then it's not just beautiful courthouse pictures, adoption day celebrations.
the real story of adoption isn't just how a child joins a family, it's about how everyone in that family learns how to become a family again. And so in that that is a struggle, you know. It's how how do you incorporate everybody into the family and and still make it we're not everybody is stressed or felt left out or anything like that. and for our family, our family wasn't created in one moment, it was through a process and not just one process.
and it was built over the years through biology, kinship, foster care, adoption, children who just simply needed someone, a whole lot of paperwork, unexpected messages, uncertain days, and a lot of saying yes and just figuring out the rest on our own. Yeah. And that's what I've had to do a lot is just figuring everything out as I went. And, you know, I know life is like that. You can prepare for a baby and the baby comes and
The AC unit goes out, the plumbing goes out, and you know, you're still, gosh, what are we gonna do? You know, and so you know, for my family, there's birth certific excuse me, birth certificates at say I'm a mom, there are adoption papers at say I'm a mom, and then there are relationships with no piece of paper was ever needed to tell what we already knew. And so, you know, even if you have a placement that just stays with you and they age out of foster care.
Yeah. They know who you are. Yeah. And so just put that positive influence in them and you know, teach them how to be just a decent human being. You don't want to teach them to to be something they're not. You know? my son asked me, Do I have to go to college? I said, I would love for you to go to college, but if that's not something you want to do, then no, you don't have to go to college.
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:12:46.439)
You know, but you're gonna work. Yeah. You've gotta have work ethic, you've gotta have a job, you know, you have to you are gonna have to supply, you know, provide for yourself. And so, my biggest thing is family isn't always determined by how a child comes into your life. Sometimes it's determined by who stays. and somehow that again. So family is isn't always determined by how a child comes into your life. Sometimes it's determined by who stays. I love that.
and then somehow that once too quiet house became a home filled with kids again. and I wouldn't change the way we found each other, one another in any of my stories. Yeah. you know, I sit and think one day my nieces will come back around, it'll come back full, you know. but until that day, you know, it is what it is. But it's
That's kinda just that's my story and that's exactly what I would say to somebody who was thinking about or who is currently in, you know, a certified foster home that, you know, they could keep that in mind and always know that
A piece of paper doesn't mean anything. You know, you raise them, you are mom, whether they call you mom or they call you Chrissa you know, or whomever your name is, you know, that's you know, you just have to play that role to them and then they will know who you are regardless. Yeah. Wow. Well, Chrissa thank you so much for coming and and just sharing, just kind of opening your heart and and I hope that I hope that somebody that's listening takes encouragement.
from from what you have talked about, or maybe they maybe they take the next step and they go go to a foster parent, you know, or orientation class just to learn a little bit more and that kind of thing. So thank you for that. And then the community, like the community seeing like this is foster care. This is it so everybody's path is different, but this this is, you know, this is foster care and that's kind of what it's like. So I appreciate your
Panhandle Orphan Care Network (01:14:55.587)
Willingness to come on and be open with us. When they say it takes a village, it truly takes a village. Absolutely. So but yes. Thank you for having me. Yeah. Thank you. Well, guys, thanks so much for tuning in to this episode of All Things Foster with Chrissa guys, you know, we provide placement packages for kiddos as they're coming into foster care. And so every kid gets a suitcase, a bible, a teddy bear, book, toy, and blanket. And then over and above that they get whatever the family needs. So it could be clothes or
diapers, car seats, formula and bottles, just whatever they need. And so in order to continue to do what we're doing, we need to we need to continue to grow and and and and in order to grow that that requires funding, right? And so we ask folks to become a placement package partner. That's where we d we just set up a gift automatically each month. You know, a hundred dollars buys us all the clothes we need for one placement package and
fifty dollars buys us a case of diapers or or ten dollars buys us buys us an outfit for a placement package so if you're if you're interested in doing that go to our website panhandleorphan.org and you can go to the donation tab and set that monthly gift up. We would really, really appreciate it. Shauna, thank you so much for your constant support of our organization. Guys if you need your house house clean, definitely call Shauna over at Classic Cleaning. Thanks so much.
Have a great week and we'll see you next time. Make sure to like and subscribe. Thanks.
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